Despite the width of the globe and the interminable delivery time of standard mail separating them, a pair of pen pals managed to write a foundation for love that has lasted 30 years.
Alena and Chad Benson first wrote to each other in 1986 with no idea it would blossom into a life-long love story.
Alena was 17 years old when she wrote a series of letters from her Singapore home to several people overseas—including Benson from Devon, in England. She was connected with this young man through the International Youth Service, once the world’s largest organization for pen pal communications, which sadly closed down in 2008.
Their letters continued through the 1980s and the two even started exchanging cassette tapes of each other chatting, with more than 100 tapes eventually being sent between them.
Speaking of the first letter, Alena said she sent “it for the fun of it, not thinking that I was going to get a reply.”
For seven years mail carriers brought Chad and Alena’s letters back and forth between Singapore and England, until Alena decided to take a big step.
“I was 23 and I was traveling around Asia so I said to my parents ‘I have been writing to this boy from England and I want to go and visit him.’ My parents didn’t stop me because they knew I loved traveling and I was quite adventurous.”
Chad says when he saw her for the first time in Heathrow Airport he thought “Wow is she my pen pal?”
During Alena’s 19 days in the UK, they realized that their connection was deeper than a mere friendship, and when Alena returned to Singapore they started calling each other almost every day.
But given WhatsApp hadn’t been invented yet, Chad’s phone bill went up to £350 a month and Alena’s reached £450.
“I paid the bill so my parents didn’t know how much it was—I didn’t tell them,” Alena admitted. “But for Chad, he had to tell his parents because the bill went to the parent’s name and his parents started panicking and they were like ‘how are we going to pay this bill Chad?'”
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Chad admitted to British news, that he paid the bill; somehow. Then it was Chad’s turn to visit Alena—in February 1994.
At this point their relationship took a major turn. He then decided to propose to her while on holiday despite the initial resistance from Alena’s parents.
“My parents were not accepting, I either had to get married, or forget everything and get back to Singapore. I made the choice to marry him anyway,” she said. “I came to a stage where I realized that we have so much history together and I couldn’t just let it go.
It was, as may perhaps be imagined, Alena’s mother who eventually realized the seriousness in her daughter’s heart and consented to the union.
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Alena then moved to the UK in 1995, and they tied the knot in Kingsbridge with a budget of $2,500. They raised a family of three kids, now all in their 20s.
“She is my best friend,” said Chad now 56. “We do everything together. She is an amazing woman.”
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